wad is it with men and their vices?

hobbies are a-ok
healthy way to spend the time
entertainment
kill boredom
yada yada
i get the fuckin picture

but when it goes into overtime
when he burns (get this) pocket money on the game
dude you haven even earned yer own keep man and ur betting it away???
when a game of stick and balls turns into a fuckin competition
do you really need to spend hours in the snooker room???

oh fuck it
why do i even bother dissect the male psyche?
ill need a phD fer this shit.






stop crying your heart out - oasis

the usual suspect said::

feeling what i shouldnt be feeling

am listenin to a canto evergreen gem
poptart's great ive experienced that
but k ge zhi wang by eason chan moved me tonight

sweet painful unrequited love
throwing yourself out there and giving all you've got
and you get a "i cant - dont hate me"
(carrie i feel your pain. bloody burger broke hearts with his bloody pink carnations)
just so raw and penetrating within my current state of sublime conscienceness

for those who dont know me well enough
i am anything but close to being a lovesick reject
i have entered that elusive plateau of rship stable-ness
i think it comes with age and maturity
and balls to recognise genuine adulation and commitment of the strongest kind
coupled with aptitude to invest time energy and basically whole of me

but i asert that its always good to remember those long lost feelings of falling out of love
when the dating game was a battleground and you're a casualty

the silent "im sorry its not you its me" letdowns or simply an outright blatant desertion
the dreadful sinking realization of being subtly played out
when you are the last to being put in the place of the male jester
the suppression of unspoken crushes and guessing games of his dubious affections
the confusion and agony of the "are we or are we not" mental debate
the guilty sticky situation of "sorry im not interested its me its not you" putdowns
the ultimate cringe-ness of your friend's ex staking an interest in you
or worst the sour taste of failure and jealousy you are into him and he is into your friend
or coming to terms with that hollow empty space within you where the tears vacated and left thru your sockets
those days of waking up and seeing the world awashed in greying mist and blackened cracks
when the blood that escaped from the pallied cut skin temporarily released some merciful tension in your left side of the chest
when you wished you were lost in eric khoo's 12th storeys falling or claustrophically


i cant say i have experienced all of the above
but from my apprehensive venture into the world of bgr since secondary school till today when im finally a half baked undergrad
my emotional mettle has taking a beating here and there
i can proudly declare that anyone who hasnt fallen out of love or walked away from a wreckage of a relationship

id say honey you haven lived

hurt makes us grow like the wise men said


my god why am i so emo tonight?

its my of those nights when i sit down and assert my self worth and history in my quest of living the meaningful life
how far have i come and how much have i learnt?
how much deviance have i allowed myself to seep into and how much have i done to rise from the shit i buried myself in?
am i capable of making the right decisions for myself yet?

'fraid not.
grace you have a long way to go
till you find the answer to this internal problem called living the meaningful life


chances are, will i ever succeed?

the usual suspect said::

gracie lou freebush* says:
i love you bobo

gracie lou freebush* says:
i wanna have children

gracie lou freebush* says:
i wanna be pregnant

gracie lou freebush* says:
i wanna procreate

gracie lou freebush* says:
i wanna uphold govt policies

gracie lou freebush* says:
have 3 or more

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANT TO WEAR MATERNITY

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANNA HAVE FOOD CRAVINGS

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANNA HAVE YOU SEND ME EVERYWHERE

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANNA GO FOR PRENATAL EXERCISES AND COURSES

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANNA BUY BABY STUFF PRAMS MILK BOTTLES BREAST MILK PUMPS

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANNA GIVE BIRTH IN MT ALVERNIA MT E OR GLENEAGLES

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANNA FEAST ALL I CAN COS I HAVE THE RIGHT TO AND YOU CAN ONLY
SHRUG AND PAY

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANNA STEP ALL OVER YOU COS I HAVE IMMUNITY HOHOHO

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANT YER MOM TO COME DOWN AND FUSS OVER ME

gracie lou freebush* says:
I WANNA STAY AT HOME ALL DAY AND READ MAGS EAT ICE CREAM AND NOT WORRYING BOUT A THING







the sun, the sea, the sand and the girl may not reply as his or her status is set to Away.





pui.







am feeling
lacadaisical/charmed/imperious
/insolent/pompous/gelastic
/kooky/venerated/adored
/blithe/effervescent/ballsy
/desirous/fervent/voracious

am i trying to describe love?



u2- staring at the sun

the usual suspect said::

my dnd pictures!
not gonna flood the page with an avalanche of photos
cos i dun have much
being one of those pre info age fossils ard without a digicam
despicable me freeloads off my more technically well equipped peers
hohoho
props to weiliang for his generosity
for taking loadsa photos of his fellow blockmate

raffles hall dinner and dance 06
the perfect excuse for uninhibited photowhores


block 3 brother weiliang


prc numba one tao longyi


chubby is the new hot
but hes not the hottest of cos


heres the hottest of cos
and here i gloat over the fact that he was MY date


nice to chuck the black specs tee and boxers
loosen the unkempt ponytail
cover the eyebags and throw on glitter and hair mousse
squeeze my amazingly lardy arse in a white dress
switch huge bags that carry everything to a lil clutch
cramp my toes into pretty heels
nice to have the best piece of human eye candy accessory on my arm
NICE.


everything - alanis morissette

a cheesy dedication to my boy.
excuse me while i gag on my own sappiness.
been a trying time to care for a lil life and see it slip away
call me pussy but i jus hate it when things die
see it anywae ky.)

the usual suspect said::

My bed is made for two
and there’s nothing I can do
So tell me something I don’t know
If my head is full of you
is there nothing I can do?
Must we all march in two by two
by two?



does anyone still listen to catatonia?
fantastic fantastic band.


something awful and dark happened to me a gazillion yrs ago
so long ago i forgot that it existed
for it was hidden away in the deep recceses of my perpetually clouded brain
but a good play brought it outta me
dormant for 15 years or so
a yellowed tiny brief piece of childhood memory fluttered to the surface
controllin my mood swings for the past 2 weeks
i let rip tonight
and im glad i did


so i thank god for artistic expression
literature
plays
words
music
and how they serve to enrich our souls
and remind us of what we have experienced once before
but conveniently banished to mental oblivion
it can be so easy to shut out horror grief or perhaps a guilty conscience doncha think?


so i thank god there are mediums available to remind us
to feel
to express
to remember
to hurt
to ponder
to be human


the social perceptions of the arts and the sciences cannot be measured thru aggregates and cut off points
why is one more superior than the other?
why is one perceived as more PRESTIGIOUS (gawd i hate that word) than the other?
why are students who prefer science ruminating and strugglin in the arts cos the latter was easier to get into?
to each his own they say
there is a need for academic equilibrium here

singapore is full of stupid statistical morons
and yes i said that
















*i shared with you something i have shared with no other. i think, for the first time in my life, i finally opened the door by a wee bit to let someone slip thru*
















mulder and scully - catatonia

the usual suspect said::

21st March 2006
6.05am
Mount Elizabeth Hospital
Ho Zhexing aka Xiaoxing entered this world



welcome my precious nephew
i can imagine the good years to come
you dont hafta do a thing but we all love you already


a new addition to the family has to be the one of the most joyful occasions in life


birth
such a miraculous and beautiful natural phenomenon
when we're new and bright and shiny
we're pure and innocent and free of sin


who says we're born with sin?
not that genuinely moment when ur lungs take in your first real gasp of air
not when your skin is tender moist and sweet
not when your pretty eyes are tightly closed and unready to see this big choatic ugly world



i cant say i understand the joys of motherhood
but i have always imagined it wld be a blast for me
hopefully when my bio clock is tickin right i wont need to invest in a sperm donar
perhaps by then the father of my two terrapins now will become the father of my children
ill keep those manicured fingers crossed



in the meantime
michaelangelo and leonardo
mummy loves you both

hohoho the pictures are backkk
here im gettin trigger-dangerous!



tonight tonight - smashing pumpkins

the usual suspect said::

cut my wrists
drain my blood
set the vultures




sit back
relax

why arent you laughin now motherfucker?







burn - tina arena


the usual suspect said::

i've been down, i've been beat i've been so tired that i could not speak
i've been so lost that i could not see
i wanted things that were outta reach
then i found you and you helped me through
and you showed me what to do


thats why im waiting here for you


like a star that guides a ship across the ocean
that's how my love can take you home and back to me
and if i wish upon that star,
someday i'll be where you are
and i know that day is coming soon


im waiting here for you


you've been alone but you did not show it
you've been in pain but i did not know it
you let me do what i needed to
you were there when i needed you
mighta let you down, mighta messed you around
but you never changed your point of view


thats why im waiting here for you




im glad you're coming home vic






what am i to you - norah jones

the usual suspect said::

oh my residential woes

where to stay and if i will receive the greenlight to stay or not
i absolutely detest powerplay and the striking of bargains
worst so if i am haplessly stuck in a situation where i cant do none but compromise


if only i saw this coming


i wont pride myself as possesin a rigid backbone
but to bend and contort for other ppl's whims and fancies is jus not me style
self detrimental effects are drily favoured over rollin over like a fat lardy dog for a belly scratch


so evict me if you have to
but it wld be nicer if you dont of cos


jus dont make me a bargain
there aint no such thing as an offer one cant refuse
leave that to the movies








avalanche of work and commitments
and so ive been warned











the shining - badly drawn boy
go listen my babies.
theres nothing NOT to love.

the usual suspect said::

i think someone just told me its week 8 already
feels like sch jus started babeyyy




i think im fucked.






holiday - greenday

the usual suspect said::

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you can not hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder, Louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say


Slower, slower
We don't have time for that
All I want's to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads


Have heart, my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if its just for a few days
Making up for all this mess

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you can not hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear






i love you but im scared to death of you.

the usual suspect said::

gracie lou freebush
miss artful dodger
1986
st.nicks/cjc/nus theatre studies
//
Let each man exercise the art he knows.
Aristophanes

The drama is not dead but liveth
and contains the germs of better things.
-william archer

• mar
• sab
• vic
• vern
• cole
• e*an
• isaac
• bryanboy
• thesuperficial
• thesartorialist
• perez hilton
• sea of shoes
• karlascloset
• anonymousworks/

is this the real life?
is this just fantasy?
caught in a landslide
no escape from reality
open your eyes, look up to the skies and see
-queen

skin by lomographylove[:
inspiration: 001